Disorganization Station – Ritalin Donations Welcome


In honor of…

Posted in Uncategorized by Hams on 2008/02/20

…my only reader, Jenny.  Bless her heart, she requested more blogs.  Thankfully I have been stupid enough recently so I have plenty of material.  Five months ago when I started this blog I had ten goals.  One of them has left me with a memory I lovingly refer to as A Tale of Three Firetrucks:  The Extremely Hot Firefighter Story.

It all started with a visit from my baby bro, Kevin, who flew in for the weekend on a short visit/job interview.  My love of the activity in #5 (hiking, not Joel, mind you) has left me with a broken right ankle and subsequently, a loss of my ability to drive.  (However, one could make a good argument for my initial possession of the aforementioned ability.)

As it would have been a crime to stay indoors on a gorgeous Saturday afternoon, I dragged Kevvie to my new favorite trail on South Mountain.  It was incredible – some guys were paragliding (or whatever you call it), people were everywhere…just a great day to be out and about.  When I pointed to our destination, my bro looked at me with amusement, then clearly attempted to discern my sanity.  Already knowing the answer and silently hoping appropriate pharmacological intervention was in progress, he nonetheless resolved to follow my lead up Telegraph Pass Trail.

The hike would nearly be uneventful, until 2/3 of the way to completion of the trip, I stepped down onto my right foot, and in my usual graceful manner, sent my body the opposite direction of my foot.  (I still maintain a gnome disguised itself as a rock and tripped me.)  The sensation of the outer part of my ankle touching the ground simultaneously with the sole of my shoe was unnerving.  Then it went the other way.  I knew something was wrong.

Long story short, being unable to hoof it further down the trail, extrication from South Mountain by 20 incredible looking firefighter/EMTs was required.  I respectfully declined transportation via both helicopter and ambulance.  I have a break in the posterior aspect of my lateral malleolus (i.e. the ankle bone that sticks out on the outside of your ankle).

Having an obvious injury to your extremities will surprisingly bring more questions than a 29 year-old with an obvious sternotomy scar.  Oh and the wisecracks…. I’ll leave you with those:

Jenny:  If I take you to get a pedicure, will I get 50% off?

PJ:  PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE tell me you have pictures.

Ken:  Do you get a discount if you just buy one shoe?

My Mother/Stepdad:  Because you can’t drive, you can’t get into any more accidents.

Multiple people:  Were the firefighters hot? (Does this really need to be asked?! I mean, seriously…..)

One extremely rude lady at Target:  A glare as I blocked the aisle with one of those scooters previously reserved for old ladies.  My response?  I don’t want to have a broken leg any more than you want me to block the aisle.  I hope you have a better day.

And with that, it’s bedtime for now.  Certainly more to follow; stay tuned for the next issue of Adventures in Absurdity.

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  1. […] Original post by Disorganization Station – Ritalin Donations Welcome […]


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